Wilde Forever (Wilde Women Book 1) Read online

  TWO BEERS AND A CRAPLOAD of pizza later, they were engaged in a belching contest that had them both roaring with laughter. She might be the only female on the planet, that he was aware of anyway, who could throw down with a Star Wars reference, follow it up with a neat Star Trek segue, try to dominate him in the bedroom, play Grand Theft Auto like one of the guys, and rip out a burp like nobody’s business. Oh yeah, all that and she didn’t take anyone’s crap. Not even his.

  “Let’s go sit in the yard,” she suggested. “It’s such a nice night. Perfect for firing up the pit.”

  “You’ve got a fire pit?” Fuck, she really was awesome.

  “Yeah.” She quirked her mouth like she was admitting to something wicked. “It was Charlie’s idea. She was in one of her nature-girl phases when she stayed here. She’s the only person I know who would spend days walking through the woods looking for the perfect rocks to build the pit. She’ll be thrilled to hear it gets used when she’s not around.”

  It really was a beautiful early fall evening, and he enjoyed lounging about talking about everything and nothing. They were camped out in a pair of Adirondack chairs set side by side debating whether the Hobbit movies were better, worse, or on the same par with the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Who the hell was this girl and why did she excite, entertain, and scare the holy fuck out of him at the same time?

  “Tell me about you sisters, Brynn. You’re the oldest?”

  She took a good healthy swig of her beer and grinned at him. “Mmmm hmmm.”

  “And?”

  The sigh she let out wrapped around his heart. He knew that sound. It was how he felt about his brother and parents. The love of family was something he understood. Something he cherished and something he was glad they shared.

  Turning toward him she leaned on an arm and tucked her legs under her ass staring off dreamily. “Well, clearly you’ve figured out that I’m the smart and clever one. Firstborns always are,” she bragged. “I got all the brains. Rhiann came next, and she got the heart. I swear sometimes that she cries watching Pampers commercials.”

  “Where is she?” he asked, curious to hear more.

  A big, proud smile lit up her face. “She lives in New York City. Works in the fashion industry doing shit I know nothing about. My fashion choices come from the ‘Old and Boring’ section at Target.”

  He liked the way she pronounced the name of the store like it was a French high fashion house – ‘Tar-jhay.’

  “I know nothing about Fashion Week but she certainly does,” she laughed. “I’ve got a hundred pictures she texted from the last one of her with every big name model walking the runway.”

  He chuckled. “Females I hope.”

  “Well, them too,” she teased right back. “Honestly, some of those guys are like made-to-order Adonis types.”

  Shit, Jax thought. He tried not to clench his jaw, but the idea of Brynn drooling over some professional six-pack runway walker made him crazy.

  Luckily she quickly added, “Not my cup of tea at all. Some guy who spends more time in front of the mirror than I do creeps me out. Not that I spend much time thinking about stuff like that. Already told you, I’m not relationship material.”

  Well. He’d just see about that, but for now he let the comment slide.

  “She doesn’t realize it, but I am well-aware that she’s gotten real close to Amy. They’re the same age. Both bona fide head cases when it comes to believing in all that happily ever after crap.”

  Interesting statement, for sure. “Does it bother you? That she’s close to your assistant, I mean?”

  “Pfft. Oh God no. Lets me off the hook. I’m glad Rhiann has someone to share all that hearts and flowers nonsense with.”

  She drifted off for a moment and Jax studied her face as a thoughtful look played across her features. Brynn had a complex inner life evident more by what she didn’t say than by what she did. He wanted in on those private thoughts. Wanted her to open up and share everything.

  Taking another long pull from her beer, she licked her lips and shifted slightly in the chair. Something was clearly going on in that head of hers. It struck him that by everything she’d told him so far, she saw herself in something of a protective role where her siblings were concerned. Made him think about the very similar relationship he had his with his brother Caleb.

  “Amy’s quite a piece of work,” Jax declared with a snicker. “She’s a glass half full person, isn’t she? I kind of like that about her.”

  Brynn rested her head on the high back of the chair for a moment, stared at the stars overhead, and took a deep breath.

  “Yeah, that’s Amy all right. She’s the least cynical person I’ve ever met.”

  “Know a lot of cynics, do you?” he asked.

  Her eyes swept quickly in his direction. Rolling a shoulder, she made a somewhat wistful face and sighed. “Just me, I suppose.”

  What did you say to a comment like that? He supposed the asshole ex-husband served up a big helping of that cynicism on a silver platter ‘cause she didn’t strike him as someone who’d always been that way.

  “They’re up to something. Rhiann and Amy. I can feel it, you know. Don’t have a clue what…..but something.”

  Jax chuckled and fixed her with a wry smile. “Ever think about asking what’s up? I hear the direct approach gets good results.”

  “That’s not how sisters work,” she giggled. “My spidey sense tells me though that whatever it is, it’ll have an element of ‘gotcha’ all over it.”

  “Know all too well how that feels,” he agreed with wide eyes. “Sometimes I think my brother fucking lives just to find ways to mess with my head.”

  Her amused snort split the nighttime air. “I hear that!” She threw up her hand for a high five that he enthusiastically smacked.

  “What about Charlize? You said she stayed here last year. Where is she now?”

  Brynn’s expression softened. “Charlie is in Tuscany. Learning all about Italian ceramics and pottery.”

  “For real?”

  “Yeah. For real. She’s an artist and a card-carrying hippie for want of a better word. The garage studio is littered with her work. Charlie is incredibly gifted and something of a free spirit,” she elaborated with a snicker. As an afterthought she added, “I wish she’d come home. I miss her terribly.”

  “When was the last time you were all together?” he asked, because it had been almost eighteen months since Caleb had been home. Like Charlie, he too was off in Europe—only Italian pottery wasn’t what drew him there.

  “Well, Charlie’s been gone for months, but we email all the time. Rhiann and I computer chat at least once a week and text of course. Matter of fact, if I can figure out how to cover my responsibilities in the bakery for a few days, I hope to shoot up to New York. Business meeting I have to be present for is also a great excuse to hang with my sis. We’ll see,” she shrugged.

  “It must be hard. What you do, I mean. Working all those hours. How come you don’t have a bakery assistant or some sort of help?”

  Brynn grimaced at his comment. Apparently he’d hit a bull’s-eye without knowing he was aiming for one.

  “Christ. You sound like my father,” she sneered.

  He hoped she was kidding with the comparison but somehow he didn’t think so. “Lady, my thoughts where you are concerned are in no way fatherly.”

  He was glad when she blushed beet red and looked at him from beneath lowered lashes. “I didn’t mean it that way.” She coughed and cleared her throat. “It’s just that he’s been after me to take on an apprentice. Something about all work and no play.”

  “Oh…” he chuckled. “So he’s met you, then?”

  In true Brynn style she flipped him the bird and quirked a half leer. “If I didn’t know better I’d think you were in cahoots with my parents on that whole ‘get a life thing’.”

  “So they’re up your skirt, are they?”

  She snorted. “Yeah, and around the bend.”
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br />   “Let me guess,” he ventured. “Something about retirement and grandchildren?”

  She gasped and looked at him, startled and wide-eyed. “How’d you know?”

  Jax finished off his beer and sat the bottle on the ground. With his fingers threaded, he leaned back in his chair and laid his hands on his stomach. “Our parents are roughly the same age. It must have been something in the water back then or some kind of synchronized delayed reaction cause grandkids are my mother’s needle scratching on a damn broken record.”

  She burst out laughing so hard she started to choke. Jax leaned forward quickly and smacked her on the back. “It’s not that funny,” he muttered with a dark scowl.

  “Oh hell yeah, it is,” she trilled with delight. “Thank God it’s not just me.”

  A thought danced through his mind, begging for release. “Do you want kids, Brynn?”

  So many expressions flitted across her face that he lost count almost immediately.

  “Marriage is not an option,” she gritted out.

  “That’s not what I asked, and you know it.”

  Her eyes narrowed, and he swore she looked like she was about to confess some deep dark secret until the moment drifted by. Even though she came back with an answer, Jax was absolutely sure it wasn’t what she’d meant to say.

  “I never really thought about it, when I was married that is. Kids always seemed like a conversation for another time. Glad I am that stupid I was not,” she mimicked in a voice that would do Yoda proud.

  “And now?”

  Usually, it was the guy who changed the subject when these issues were brought up, but in their dynamic, it was Brynn who was pedaling as fast as she could away from anything that even remotely resembled talking about the future. Why that bothered him wasn’t exactly a mystery.

  With impressive precision, Brynn chose that moment to yawn as if she hadn’t slept in a dog’s age. What a fucking piece of work this amazing woman was. Even though it was kind of late, by the time clock of a busy bakery owner anyway, he didn’t want the night to end. Not yet.

  He let the question about children and the future evaporate in the nighttime air. It was out there hanging though and for now, that would have to do.

  “I think it’s past your bedtime, lady,” he murmured softly. “Time to tuck you in.”

  “Mmmmmm.” She took a handful of deep breaths with her head on the back of her chair and her eyes closed. “Yeah, you’re right. Time to hit the snore pads.”

  The pit fire had burned down to a pile of reddish gold embers pulsing with heat not too much unlike the throbbing of sexual desire centered in his groin. It wasn’t something that could be helped, he admitted wryly. Just being around her was enough to stoke the flames of arousal she ignited inside him. Knowing when to act on those passions and when to pull the fire alarm was quite the challenge.

  “I’ll take care of the fire if you grab the empties for the recycling bin, okay?”

  The look she gave him came very close to stealing his fucking sanity. With only the light of the fire beneath a darkened sky with clouds obscuring the moonlight, her eyes glittered with something his mind read as hunger. Was it a yearning for him or for the things he could make her feel or were those two things just different sides of the same coin?

  He needed some time to think. His outburst earlier, even though he’d managed to quickly reel himself in before he scared the shit out of her, drove home with force that getting involved with Brynn Wilde was opening a door inside him that he was careful to keep locked and bolted at all times. Fuck. Even the slightest acknowledgment of the demons tucked away in his psyche was enough to cause him to break out in a line of sweat at the back of his neck.

  He didn’t wait for her response, just turned and went about dousing the fire with a jaw clenched so tight it was a wonder his teeth didn’t crumble. Jax could hear her moving about, picking up the empty beer bottles; the sound of her flip-flops shuffling and the glass bottles tinkling as they connected was all that broke the silence.

  Brynn had gone back inside the house leaving Jax to his thoughts as he stood and watched the dying embers, the scent of wood smoke stinging his nose while a thousand and one emotions mixed with anxiety and a bit of fear ran riot inside him.

  Hands going to his waist, he shook his head and lowered it in thoughtful repose, momentarily letting the presence of a shitload of old issues rise to the surface. It took all his strength to keep the anger at bay. Accepting the struggles that came along with the aftermath of his war experiences wasn’t easy and at times like these, pissed him off royally. There was a damn good reason why he’d never attempted a relationship after Heather had blown his shit out of the water. She might have been an A-1 bitch about it, but he’d been forced to admit that living with him and the shit he now dealt with wasn’t exactly a walk in the park.

  Fuck, man. During that whole first year after he was back in civilian life, he’d developed so many PTSD triggers it took a personal valet running along behind him to keep all that heavy baggage from dragging him permanently into a pit of despair. Luckily, he’d had an awesome counselor who helped him recognize what was happening and also gave Jax a vast arsenal of coping strategies so his life wouldn’t fucking implode.

  When he’d gotten to the house and realized Brynn had zero understanding of how important situational awareness was, he’d gone into search and destroy mode at finding the front door unlocked. When she walked down the steps and he’d seen she was coming from the shower, he almost exploded.

  And that right there was what he needed to stop and think about. Yeah, he’d been reacting to an old trigger, but this time it was infused with a fierce throb of protective impulse for the woman scattering his thoughts that went far beyond a reflex and dug so deep into his soul he’d been staggered by the intensity. Brynn Wilde was embedded under his skin in a way that made him sweat.

  As he approached the back door he could see her through the windows tidying up as she moved around the kitchen. That damn dress she had on, something he was pretty sure was the type women throw on after a shower, tightened his balls. It was short and flirty and gave her the look of an innocent college ingénue. Made all the emotions running rampant in his brain crash into each other.

  The moment he stepped through the door, she grabbed something off the counter and hurried over to him.

  “Here are the keys for the garage and the house. I had the studio and loft cleaned and you’ll find the whole place is supplied with pretty much anything you could need. Sorry in advance about the pink roses,” she mumbled with an adorable smirk. “Charlie bought all the linens and towels and stuff. She felt the place needed some color to liven things up so she sort of went off the rails at Bed, Bath, and Beyond.”

  She was edging closer with her hand out and the keys dangling from a finger. It was all he could do not to grab a hold of her wrist and yank her in closer until her soft body in that unintentionally sexy dress was pressed against him.

  Accepting the keys, he sent her a lackluster smile that was as empty and fake as a reality TV star. Say something, his mind screamed at him because he knew keeping everything bottled up wasn’t going to make it go away.

  Mouth set in a grim line, Jax cleared his throat and shifted back and forth as if finding a comfortable position was going to make any damn difference.

  “Brynn,” he began hesitantly, trying not to sound completely bent out of shape. Fuck. Finding the right words was hella’ difficult. “Look. About earlier.”

  The proceed with caution expression plastered on her face gave him the push he needed to soften his tone.

  “You need to be way more careful about locking your doors and shit.”

  Annoyance flashed in her eyes, and she gave him a go fuck yourself smirk. Okay, this already wasn’t going how he planned, and he’d barely said anything.

  “I’m sorry,” she bit out. “Do I look like someone who needs a security lecture? I’m not stupid and I told you, I knew you were coming whic
h is why the door was unlocked. This house is off the beaten path and really Jax, nobody ever comes up the drive.”

  He wanted to grab her and shake some damn sense into that I can take care of myself bullshit she had going on.

  “You live behind a place of business Brynn, and the driveway is hardly hidden. In case you haven’t looked in the mirror lately, you’re a beautiful fucking woman who lives alone. All it takes is one psycho creep to go off and next thing you know this conversation would be taking place in a hospital emergency room or a police station. Or worse,” he added solemnly at the end.

  She didn’t look happy at his high-handed tone and was clearly getting ready to rip into him when he pulled a fuck it and finally yanked her close. Colliding with his hard body she let out a startled gasp as his hands squeezed her arms tight for emphasis.

  “Don’t fucking argue with me woman,” he growled.

  “Ow,” she griped. “You’re hurting me.”

  “This is real world shit lady and since you obviously don’t take your own security seriously, I will. I’m going to do a lot more than hurt you Brynn if you don’t listen up and do as you’re told”

  “What are you going to do? Spank me like a bad kid?”

  He knew his eyes flared at her suggestive words because he saw them reflected in her own. Spank her? Fuck yeah he’d spank her. Gladly. Until her bottom was red, on fire, and his handprint clearly visible. Maybe then she’d get a fucking clue and stop being belligerent for the sake of pissing him off.

  “Don’t tempt me, baby.” Shit. That got her going, and she began struggling to get out of his hold.

  “Don’t you ‘baby’ me!”

  That was it. He’d had enough. This was an issue that wasn’t open to negotiation or any of her female mind games. Time to let her know who the fuck she was dealing with.

  Roaring like an angry beast, he pulled her along until he got to a kitchen chair where he promptly sat down with a thud and yanked her down until she fell over his lap. With the wind knocked out of her momentarily she stopped fighting him long enough for Jax to push her dress up over her ass to reveal the demure pink panties adorned with butterflies she was wearing.